Arm Bands

Illustration credits: Emily Nash

I keep my mind focused

On self-love

Won’t keep it racing

Maintaining that grudge

I respect every inch

Of my body and soul

I care for my wounds

Blot them with alcohol

A shot

More

A glass

More

A bottle

More

But I exercise

Frequently

Put the good food

In my body

Yet I still find myself

Unable to sleep

My mind is too loud

Your voice on repeat

Calming me down

But sometimes keeping me up

So I take a shower

Or have a bath

I wear my tiara

To feel less scarred

A new persona

That tries so hard

Landed in hell

Slipped on the shards

Acrylic nails to claw my way out

But drowning without a guard

Or even a window in my bedroom

I’ve never been good at swimming

I’ve almost drowned more times

Than the number of laps I can do

Symbolic, perhaps

What keeps me going are the calm day chimes

I remind myself that I’m not always like this

And that arm bands are okay sometimes.